Persevere, Cross
the Great Water
Saturday, September 21, 2013: Continuous consultations with the I Ching in the previous five months urged me again and again to “persevere, to cross the great water.” It was a curious expression to me, which I took quite literally—though I really could not see a means or a point in crossing the Rio Grande from where I was temporarily living in Texas then into Mexico. But as my knowledge of the I Ching grew during the next few months, I began to understand it on a symbolic level.
And, finally, I had an aha moment. To cross the great water (or river as it is sometimes called in the I Ching) was not referring in my case to a physical journey, but rather to my spiritual journey, as is suggested by the initial title of my memoir and website, Syzygy: Crossing the Bridge to Self. But when that name for my domain was not available, I had changed the title of my memoir and website to In the Night of Day.
In the process of rebranding, I had lopped off the bottom of my mother's painting, which of course was depicted from the very start as me, in a champagne-colored Topaz, demons and all, crossing a body of water, and in that process I also lopped off the symbol of the Self. But in my aha moment I realized that the I Ching was telling me to do it, already, that is, the Work: building this website and editing my memoir, which double as both my work and my Work, and my symbolic journey, that is, crossing the bridge (the water) to self, that is, my process of individuation.
And in my new understanding of the symbolism of the I Ching, I intuitively knew that I had to revert to my original syzygy title, even if few would recognize that term.
It seems I recall that the rep I spoke to said the domain name I wanted, syzygy, in all the variant forms I could think of, was taken when I first decided to build this website. There must have been something else to it, and surely it is written in my notes somewhere, because it occurred to me: What is the likelihood that someone already bought the domain: Syzygy: Crossing the Bridge to Self? Thinking perhaps there was a misunderstanding, I called my service provider again about the availability of the syzygy domain and, of course, it was available. The Universe seemed to speak through the I Ching in an unexpected way. I bought the domain and reverted to the original title and art work that my mother created, and all felt right with the world. ♂ ♀
My Unconscious Omission of the Cross May Hint
at Something Deeper
Sunday, March 17, 2013. When I changed the title of my memoir to accommodate a domain name, I had to modify the original artwork my mother painted for me. I cropped out the lower portion, the Crossing the Bridge to Self part, though I did keep and incorporated all of its elements into the design of this website, or so I thought. I unconsciously overlooked one little element while designing this website: the cross.
I didn’t notice it until an hour ago when I was editing the Jung & Me page and got to thinking about my dilemma about the Trinity and the impact the knowledge of the Assumption might have had on my psyche to say a new version of the Sign of the Cross without rebuke: “In the name of the Father, the Mother, the Son, and the Holy Ghost. Amen.”
And as I wrote the above sentence, it struck me even funnier that the element I’m referring to is the only element in this painting that is in both worlds, in the conscious and the unconscious realms, not that I thought of it that way consciously during its creation.
And then it hit me. I may have unconsciously rejected the cross because I unconsciously felt rejected by the cross, considering the omission of Mother, kind of the way I unconsciously rejected my Dad when I was a newborn. He had no idea I could sense his rejection of me from the womb, and I wouldn’t know it myself for years to come.
And triple the synchronicity—or quadrangle it—considering